The United Republic of Children (A Dictatorship in the Making)
I wanted this post to be about my viewpoint on the way we parent children. That way, if you don't agree or at least see where I'm coming from, you can grumble or leave an angry comment and then move on with your life.
I've been to a lot of households. I've talked to a lot of children and equally, a lot of parents. There has been this glaring trend where parents, in an effort to ensure that their child feels love and happiness, have in turn created a Dictatorship inside their homes. And unfortunately for us all, they aren't the ones running it. Showing your child love and instilling, at the very least, basic guidelines to being a decent human are not mutually exclusive. In other words, you can not cater to your child's every want and still have them grow up knowing that you love them. It's a balance and one where the scales are unfortunately falling in the child's favor more and more. I see more and more parents fearing their child's reaction to certain situations. Fear cannot exist in any healthy relationship. Your child should not fear you and you should not fear your child.
Children ARE exasperating. They are difficult and they are confusing. They are learning the ins and outs of a world that you've mastered. It's A LOT of work being a child! The job of a caregiver is to guide, to teach, and to discipline. Your job as a caregiver is to provide an environment where your child can make mistakes but you also need to allow yourself to parent. The household where the child is schooling the parents is not a happy household. We as adults do not go about demanding what we want when we want it but for some reason we see this as accepted practice if you're a child. I think it's bizarre and I think we need to have a change of attitude towards what it means to be a parent. We'll talk a lot in the future about how to stay in your path as a parent without feeling the guilt of not giving in to the tiny person in front of you. Hopefully we can change the thinking of "having" a child into "raising" a child.
What do you think about the state of parenting?